Thursday, September 30, 2004
4:12 PM
omg
gimmi a break.i'm gonna sleep.
tiring day today.
someone juz save me~
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
10:37 PM
Omg to Day 3 of 2 week of sufferings.... -.-'''
Yawnz... so happy today :) cuz today time flies very very fast... lalalalla ^_^ and... i've got a B in my research Theory yeah... YipEe~!~!~!~!~lalalalala.... so happy leh.....
anyway today nth much happening things going on.. except tmr is morning shift.. so after typing this.. gonna go ZZzzZ cuz tmr morning ard 4am wake up liao -.-
i juz wet my eyes sia.... cuz i watch a very very touching mtv clip from my friend webby at
http://w-e-i-p-i-n-g.blogspot.com
or another alternative way is to click on the title :)
go to her website and u will see a mtv clip.... 8mins of the mtv clip.. but very touching... those sentimental feelings... i think prepare tissues ba... even i cry sia.... veyr touching...
so hope u guys like the clips.. i'll keep ya guys updated :)
ciaoz nite :)
Tuesday, September 28, 2004
10:26 PM
Omg to Day 2 of 2 week of sufferings.... -.-'''
OMg... I think i gonna be rot till d.e.a.d during this 2 weeks of attachment >_<anyway today time pass very very ............. s....l....o........w ahhhhhhh......
the only bz time. after evening. and so from 1pm to 6pm practically i'm like zombie.. walking ard.. looking at case sheet.. walking ard.. looking at case sheet.. ocasionally do some hrly parameters.. clear bedpan >_<
haiyo....
and mdm yeo is very very very very very nagging.... and she doesn't listen when we talk. she juz talk talk talk talk & talk talk talk...... haiyo....
mdm lim is better :)
so today... the only Brighten up thing is that i help a handsome doc to shapron.. lalala....~ cute looking guy... haha.. is one of my motivation loL~~~~~~~~ -.-'''
hey i'm nt desprate.. (if u thinking of it) haha.. sometime u need to have something to brighten up ur day :)
like today i push some those newly born baby to the parents.... awwwww they are so so so so so cute....
haix.... anyway exam around the corner..... although only 3 papers this time.. but i want to do well :)
Jia you jia yoU!
and then...got case studies to do... >_< sianz 1/2....
and then vtp attachment is up...... my 1 mth attachment will be at dec onwards... so nov is my holiday~ lalalalal~ ^_^
i juz hope tmr more things to learn to experience to do...... ")
ciaoz. nite to ya guys.
*to my friend who is trouble abt his work, his stuffs.. juz wanna tell him not to bottle up ur problems... muz take care.... anything gimmi a msg or a call.. oki?*
nite :)
Monday, September 27, 2004
10:48 PM
Omg to Day 1 of 2 week of sufferings.... -.-'''
oki. settle i'm gonna juz typw out whatever is on my mind for 5 mins.. haha.. cuz my bro. is juz beside me waiting for his turn to use.. (with a chopper in his hand -.-''')anyway.. let me see. today went for my first day at ward 42 under O&G. this week i will be under gyn. where by is on female repro. disorders. while Obs is under preg lady. pre & post ops.
well.. the good news: i can go to delivery ward on next monday and nursery on next thur!!! yeah!!!
bad news which is not exactly tat bad.. but is still bad.. -.- duhz what am i saying.. oki.. my lect. in charge: Yeo-Ee-No & elizarbert Lim. sianz lah. let maternal lecturer to be my letureer in charge.. then she will asked alot of question which i practically doesn't noe anything... geeze......
which we did disappoint her... when she asked several questions to all of us... we al kept quiet becuz we duno how to ans her.. aww.. she so disappinted.. with her tone "u all muz go and read ur lecture notes.. otherwise ppl will think u are inadequate in knowledge..." i guess only my polyfriends can imagine her saying tat to us "P
and my sister.. wow.. she "great" telling us that do hypocount do not use latex glove but to use those plastic glove -.-'''
cost effective sister. & she likes to complain. with the aggreement from the lecturers also.
well.. guess my 2 weeks life.. will be kinda.. complain nagging complain nagging ba...
anyway the ward here is nt busy... practically nth to do.. so can look at case note talk to preg. lady.. look at the babies.....
the babies.... they are so so so so so so ... cute..... with the big impact on how i think of watching the delivery process on video in school....
i think i will end here first.
my bro keep kp kp.. -.-''' cannot make it lah.. cant even type properly -.-''' dot dot
Sunday, September 26, 2004
10:43 AM
Fri & Sat ^_^
haha.... recently a bit slow in updating my blog.. "P ok.. here goes.. think gonna be a very very long blog ba.. go and get some cookies and milk to eat.. lalalaa.....anyway.. start from friday... friday went out with my poly friends to orchard to buy for eve's present and for me.. my belated present....
actually i was quite shock when they tell me previous week that they intend to buy the skirt which i was telling them.. cuz they say they own me a present... i was shock.. cuz.. is so belated liao...and somemore i didn't expect them to raise it up again....
but nevertheless thanks to u guys :)
so they bought me pepperplus skirt.. is not a skirt made of pepper... haha... so lame hor.. lol..
we went to LJS to eat.. then we sat at a corner where their aircon is free de... lol..... we were like freezing the whole way through.... and the funniest thing is that.. we suggest to move to other seats when we are going to finish out meal -.-''' that's dot dot right.....
then a gd news is tat... i've got a B for my bio practical+theory.. yeah!! finally got a B liao.. i thought i will be like year 1 being cursed.. and then.. fail.. scare sia.....
hehe.. ^_^ happy happy
and then.. when we going to toilet.. guess who we saw.... we saw the singapore idol finalist!! haha.. Christopher Lee & David Yeo.. wow.. dashing & handsome hahaha.. my friends and i still blur blur stone there... think "eh, they look familar" haha.. very nice looking.. :)
well.. the percentage of bumping to stars or popular faces is not tat high.. for me... haha.. then allright lah.. cuz i supporting maia lee.. ^^ jia you~
anyway back to us.. so i finished my shopping left.. eve.. then she wanted a bag or a top but.. in the end.. she cant find anything tat's eye for her.. haha...
then we go take neo-prints.. this is the first time i take so many neo-print.. 3 times hahaha..... but it was fun though some of the pics wasn;t tat nice.. :( but nevertheless is great with them around ^^
so here are the pics... anyway if u are my multiply friend.. u can go to my homepage..those dun have.. juz look here can liao right.. nth much to see anyway.. hahaha.....
colorful hor.. haha.. is rare for the 7 of us to gather together.. is like duno how many chances of it.. lol... ^^ but is great to be with them.. :D and again thanks for the skirts.. thanks alot ^_^
this is the 2nd machine we took.. then.. turn out quite nice.. glitering.. then the rest find very nice.. then decided to take another round again.. haha.. but i think we 1st time duno what to do.. in the end... i got stepped by someone lah.. haha.. then pain pain my toe ~_~
so this is the 3rd pic.. haha.. find it more weird.. i agree with xueying.. i think we take once enough liao.. haha 2nd time more weird.. but nevertheless nvm lah.. lol~ :)
oh yah.... i juz remember... we also did some funny thing... we went to a acceories shop.. then we look look then spotted a ring which got a star on it... haha... and then... we 7 of us buy the same ring... lol -.-'''' hahaha... thinking back of it..... lol... can really laugh on the floor liao..... hahahaha... i was joking with them saying "if we happen to get lost.. we asked around asking ppl.. have u seen a girl with a star ring on the finger..." it become 7 of us label.. hahaha..
and somemore u should look at the sales girl... when we pay for the ring... we each pay separtly.. then she have to cash in 7 times of the same ring.... hahaha...
so in the end we walked walked... i was feeling very bloated and very tired.. i think ate too much le.... thought can eat my tori-Q in the end cannot eat :( haix....
so we walked around... then saw ronalda..in S&K @ wisma.. still preetier as usual... then long time nv contact them le... then saw kelvin also.. then i realise eugene they are having dinner+clubbing at nite.. hahah... of cuz i nv go.. cuz i very tired liao.. somemore u think i can go clubbing meh..
i think i get throw by chopper by my dad first.. lol...
so in the end.. nv get eve's present.. so i think we gonna meet some other days or wat ba...
so back home.. i was extremly tired.. i think 9+ or 10 i go fall asleep soudly..... *yawnz*
then i realise.. my friend, leo went back to state liao.. glad to see him he;s fine.. and all the best to him :)
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Sat:
went out with my mum to Lot 1 to buy my shoe.. cuz my attachment coming liao ah!!!!!!!
this monday!!
-.-'''' hai yo.....
hope it will be a gd experience :) and for the next 2 weeks u will see my blog full of my inciddent in hospital.. and of cuz i wouldn't be bloggin tat frequent.. i might be very tired...
anyway.. so at nite as usual talked to lots of friends.. then ah boi tell me if i tue can meet turtle out together before he book in....
haix.... how i wish to lah... but tue i working afternoon shift mah...1-9 pm.. unless u guys want morning loh.... haha....
haix.. only can say.. gd luck & jia you for turtle in booking in ba.. meet together some other time.. where i can laugh at ur botak head. "P
sat. nv much. cuz nv go out.. nth.... stay at home and read my comics.. :P hehehe....
i think tat's the end le.... go and play my online game liao..
ciaoz~~
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Friday, September 24, 2004
6:09 AM
Story to share.
Another story to share from my friend charlene :)-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
One night there was a woman at the airport who had to wait for several hours before catching her next flight. While she waited she bought a book and a pack of biscuits to spend the time.
She looked for a place to sit and waited. She was deep into her book, when suddenly she realized that there was a young man sitting next to her who was stretching his hand, with no concern whatsoever, and grabbing the pack of cookies lying between them.
He started to eat them one by one. Not wanting to make a fuss about it she decided to ignore him. The woman, slightly bothered, ate the cookies and watched the clock, while the young and shameless thief of biscuits was also finishing them.
The woman started to get really angry at this point and thought "If I wasn't such a good and educated person, I would have given this daring man a black eye by now."
Every time she ate a biscuit, he had one too. The dialogue between their eyes continued and when only one biscuit was left, she wondered what was he going to do.
Softly and with a nervous smile, the young man grabbed the last biscuit and broke it in two. He offered one half to the woman while he ate the other half. Briskly she took the biscuit and thought, "What an insolent man! How uneducated! He didn't even thank me!"
She had never met anybody so fresh and sighed relieved to hear her flight announced. She grabbed her bags and went towards the boarding gate refusing to look back to where that insolent thief was seated.
After boarding the plane and nicely seated, she looked for her book which was nearly finished by now. While looking into her bag she was totally surprised to find her pack of bi scuits nearly intact. If my biscuits are here, she thought feeling terribly, those others were his and he tried to share them with me.
Too late to apologize to the young man, she realized with pain, that it was her who had been insolent, uneducated and a thief, and not him.
How many times in our lives, had we known with certainty that something happened in a certain way, only to discover later that it wasn't true?
How many times has our lack of trust within us made us judge other people unfairly with our conceited ideas, often far away from reality.
That is why we have to think twice before we judge others.
Let's always give others the benefit of the doubt before we think badly of them.
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have u ever really judge ppl by its action and look without finding the truth..? i guess everyone has it once, wheather to judge ppl or judge by others. i've judge ppl and being judged by people before.
remember in sec school. i've heard how some ppl judge me by how i bring out myself. "childish, immature.." speak truthfully, times i might be childish, times i might be immature. but i believe in myself that there are certain life experiences i have gone through is much more greater than some of the people of my age. i'm not saying i've gain lots of experiences but there are some ways where i go through it, it indee shaped my thinking and myself.
i might be as childish, immature, good for nothing watever the judgement is.. i might be smiling to u making jokes but i can be crying and bothered in my heart and mind.
things aren't always just so clear cut afterall.
Thursday, September 23, 2004
3:39 PM
surprise!
hola! surprise!hahah.. blogging now in school... cuz.. i got a freaking 4 continous break.. blar blar.....
anyway.. first of all.. HAPPY BDAY TO EVELYN~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ hahah.. today is her day wor.
anyway i think yesterday too tire liao. then msg her at 12+ am to wish her happy bday.. i send her happy 18th bday. and when u think there's nth wrong with it. nahx.. she's 19 years old. lol..
and untill when she send me sms that thx for making her younger i then realise i wish her wrong age liao. -.-''' hahah
paiseh wor.
anyway.. my assignment. haven finish. but half lah. still can lah hor.. hahaa..today confirm muz pia. otherwise tmr cannot hand in i get 0 marks. 0 leh~!
haiyo.. thinking now is week.. 12 le. which means. week 13 that is next week going to attachment again.. -.-' haix... going to attachment is not as fun it seems to be.
super early to wake up and to stand whole day long for 8 hrs. sometimes u met patients who are in bad mood. nurses in bad mood. lecturers in bad moood. and once u noe u are in tat situation. i can proudly say i'm dead. hahahaha
but .. muz think of bright side.. (light bulb)... sometimes not many times u will met those @!#!^#% ppl.. most of the times ppl are nice there.. if u are nice to them they will be nice to you.. :) heheh
next 2 weeks i will be at maternal & infant area.. where i think i shall be seeing delievary process.. juz pray for me that i dun *pengz* cuz.. seeing the video in school already makes me imagine untill cannot make it.. i juz -______-''''
oh.. i muz go le. last lecture to attend.. lalala... then can go home and u guys will see my online in msn ^^ hehheeh
ciaoz.
jia you~!
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
7:27 AM
to all cs player
to my friends who play cs this song is dedicated to u guys.. but for those who nv play before.. still can watch.. the only thing is that u have to know chinese.. haha..here's the webby: http://www.pconline.com.cn/pcedu/carton/mtv/0312/265625.html
Tuesday, September 21, 2004
7:14 PM
Sorry Sorry
Another story.. extracted from desmond's blog.. is long story but worth it to read. :)------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was first day of the mid-year exams, therefore i finished school a little earlier, i called him,
: Hey, I finished school earlier today, would you come by and pick me up?
: All right, give me 5 minutes.
: 5 minutes? But my school is just beside your house.
: I need to get ready.
: All right, make it fast then.
2pm in the afternoon, the sun is extremely hot; I stood under a shaded tree and fan myself. Although it doesn't make much of a difference, it was better that I fanned. 5 minutes have passed, he's still not shown up, I was a lil' unhappy while looking at my watch. 10 minutes and he's still not here.... couldn’t be that he was met with an accident? 15 minutes passed, he finally shown up.
: Why are you so late?
: He wasn't even a lil' bothered
: Nahz. I was watching TV.
: What?! TV?! Why don't you sleep, bathe and eat before you come down then?
I haven't got anything else to say for that, didn't take the helmet he handed me but stood there and stared at him.
: Sorry.
This was the first time he said sorry to me... He is an egoistical person all along and has never once apologised to a girl. I looked at him, Alright, took the helmet and let him sent me home. He is always acting like this, no explanations, no friction, no quarrels. The only thing he does is to apologise. To me, some things can't be settled with a sorry. I would never go on asking after every time he apologises. He told me, that was the first time he said sorry to a girl. Although it take courage to admit mistakes, he never once correct his mistakes. Saying sorry became a word to shut me up instead.
Tears flowed down my cheek on the 59th time he apologised. I dropped my head
: You don't ever need to say sorry to me again. If you can never change, then don't let me keep giving you chances again and again hoping and believing that you would change each time.
He held me lightly, and said the 60th sorry. Even then, he did not change, and there was no explanation whatsoever. I began to worry if there was something he was keeping from me.
: What’s wrong with you these few days?
: Nothing.
: Then why are you acting so strange?
: I am not.
: What can you say other than this answer?
: Do you know I'm very worried, very insecure, do you treat me as your girlfriend?
: I'm sorry...
: I don't want to hear you say sorry again.
I put down the phone and he did not call back. He doesn't even care about me. Maybe we should.... break up.... This was the 99th time he said sorry...
From that day onwards, I never once called him or went to look for him. Sometimes I get an anonymous phone call but every time I said hello, it was dead, I think it's a call from him, but why don't he speak up? After one month has passed, I couldn't contain the feelings I still have for him anymore and went to his school to find him. I went outside his classroom and looked around, but there was no sign of him.
: Excuse me, is XOXO here today?
: I'm afraid he already stopped schooling.
: Huh? Why? When was that?
: He hasn't been in school for a month already.
: Oh erms...thanks.
One month.... not in school for one month...why is that so? I stumbled home. Called his hp
: Sorry the caller is currently unavailable, please leave your message after the tone....
I put down the phone, and called his house next, but there was no answer. How can it be? The whole family migrated? It seems as though he has already disappeared from the face on the earth leaving not even a single trace. I couldn't find him.... just as I was feeling distraught, the phone suddenly sounded, it was my friend. He was one of his brothers and also my good friend.
: Hey, what have you been doing? XOXO is in hospital.
: REALLY? WHAT HAPPENED?
: Oh he is in ZZ hospital, the one you stayed in last time.
:I'll be right there.
I used the fastest speed my legs could carry and when I reached the hospital I saw that his parents were already there. I asked them for the room number and flew across the hall. He was lying on bed, looking at me, not saying a word, not moving a muscle,
: Hey, what happened to you? Why didn't you contact me?
He did not answer, and used the same stare on me again.
: Come on answer me...why don't you speak?
A tear flowed down the side of his eye, and it looked as though he used the greatest amount of strength that he could master to say...
: I'm...sorry...
After that, his eyes went shut.
: Hey, don't fool around all right...why say sorry to me?
: Don’t say sorry to me.... please wake up.... answer me please.
I wept and fell down on the side of his bed, pulling his shirt I cried out..
: Why do you have to apologise? Why don't you give me an explanation instead?
: I won't forgive you, wake up, saying sorry is no use...
: If you don't wake up I'll never ever forgive you in this lifetime, please I beg of you. Open your eyes...
That was the 100th sorry. A group of medical staff, doctors, and nurses pulled me away and tried to revive him. I had no strength to stand up... My mind was a blank.... my eyes could only see a sea of black.
He did not leave this world...I merely lost the chance to touch him anymore. But he would appear in my dreams sometimes, telling me how he was doing. He's still accompanying me, still alive, in my heart. Would still laugh at my silliness, and call me his darling.... just that...he never apologise to me anymore.
After a month, his mom came to look for me, and gave me a box...inside was a 100 photographs, everyone had a story behind them. The reasons why he made me angry.
The first time, my dear, I did not purposely arrive late to pick you up. I know this excuse is really lame, but I didn't have the heart to tell you the truth then, before I stepped out of the house, I felt a pain in my chest, but I still made it a point to meet you, please forgive me?
The second time, my dear, I...
The third time, my dear, I...
The 100th time, my dear, I didn't mean to leave you alone in this world, It had to be so because God did not give me the chance to say I Love You for this lifetime of mine, and to put the ring on your finger.... You are the first girl I apologised to. And also the first girl I want to be with for the rest of my life... Forgive me for not able to bring you happiness but I have thus become your angel, always looking out for you... Looking at you while you find your happiness... promise me...don't shed a tear... I don't want to see you weep like this for me, I Love You ~XOXO
How can I not cry? What you said was just too impossible. The last photograph was of him in the hospital, although he was skinny, the smile on his face was bright as ever. His face was white and yet he tried his best to give his last smile on the last photo, the 100th. At the time when he needed me the most, I wasn't with him.
:I'm sorry. I held the photo tightly and cried for us...
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sadded story right??
haix..... anyway juz back home.... today test... hai hao lah... think can manage to pass.. now have to chiong for my 1000 words essays le.... jia you jia you~
i think i juz stop blogging today. juz dun feel like blogging much.
ciaoz.
8:40 AM
later later
i think i juz blog after i come back home from my test.a lot of things i want to blog... but my mind is pack with my research info. dun think i wanna mix it up.
juz thinking that this morning not a day to start with.
Sunday, September 19, 2004
3:41 AM
gd morning, gd nite
hola! hahah first time ever see me so "early" online ba.... actually nth to do and my com have been running since night? lol..... cuz my bro..crazy de lah.. "park" the character like wat sia....anyway..... so i nth to do.. was kinda awake.... so went and look around at the blogs.. saw desmond blog.... got a nice story to share.....
oh oh..... before that.... my com.... hahah solve settle. and now...very alive.. like dragon lol.~~~ -.-''' <-- hao lame wor...
and the reason.. nt so complex like whoever leave the comments at my blog... anyway thx... is juz tat i place the color to 256 bit lol~ suppose to be high color 16 lah.. haha... anyway... thx to desmond also... who tried to "invade" my com using netmeeting.... lol....but in e end ur help also no use.. lol......
so in e end i admit.. i'm a computer retard lol.......
oh btw i change my a/c setting to only blogger user can place comment... for my friends who did not have.. can use my tag board.. :) but remember to use ur name as nick wor ^^ so i noe who u guys are... better than let me ponder who are u guys... and go around asking...... :D
anyway this is gonna be another long long story... and a rather more personal blog entry :)
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so here;s the story from desmond's blog:
I cried for my brother 6 times
I was born in a secluded village of a mountain.
Days by days my parents plowed the yellow dry soil with their backs facing the sky. I have a younger brother, 3 years younger than me.
Once, to buy a handkerchief which all girls around me seemed to have, I stole 50 cents from my father's drawer. Father known about it right away. He made my younger brother and me kneeled against the wall, with a bamboo stick in his hand.
"Who stole the money?" he asked.
I was stunned, too afraid to talk. Father didn't hear any of us admit, so he said,
"Fine, if nobody wants to admit, you two should be beaten!"
He lifted up the bamboo stick. Suddenly, my younger brother gripped father's hand and said," Dad, I was the one who did it!"
The long stick smacked on my brother's back repeatedly. Father was so angry that he kept on whipped my brother until he lost his breath. After that, he sat down on our stone bed and scolded my brother,
"You have learnt to steal from your own house now, what other embarrassing things you will do in the future?? You should be beaten to death! You shameless thief!"
That night, mother and I hugged my brother. His body full of injuries, but he didn't shed a single tear. In the middle of the night, all of sudden I cried out loudly. My brother covered my mouth with his little hand and said,
" Sis, now don't cry anymore. Everything has happened."
I still hate myself for didn't have enough courage to admit what I had done. Years gone by, but the incident still looked like it just happened yesterday. I will never forget my brother's expression when he protected me.
That year, my brother was 8 years old; I was 11 years old.
When my brother was in his last year of his lower secondary school, he was accepted in an upper secondary school in the central. At the same time, I was accepted into a province's university.
That night, father squatted in the yard, smoking, packet by packet. I could hear him said,
"Both our children have good results? very good results?"
Mother wiped off her tears and sighed,
" What is the use? How can we possibly finance both of them?"
At that time, my brother walked out, he stood in front of father and said,
"Dad, I don't want to continue my study anymore, I have read enough books."
Father swung his hand and slapped brother on his face.
"Why do you have a spirit so damn weak? Even if it means I have to beg for money on the streets, I will send you two to school until you both finish your study!"
And then, he started to knock on every house in the village to borrow money. I stuck out my hand as soft as I can to my brother's swollen face, and said,
"A boy has to continue his study; If not, he will not be able to leave this depths of poverty."
Me, on the other hand, had decided not to further my study to university.
Who knows on the next day, before dawn, my brother left the house with a few pieces of worn-out clothes and a few dry beans. He sneaked to the side of my bed and left a note on my pillow;
"Sis, get into an university is not easy. I will go find a job and send money to you."
I held the note while sitting on my bed, and cried until I lost my voice.
That year, my brother was 17 years old; I was 20 years old. With the money father borrowed from the whole village, and money my brother earned from carrying cement on his back at construction site, finally, I managed to get to the third year of my study in the university.
One day, I was studying in my room, when my roommate came in and told me,
"There's a villager wait for you outside!"
Why is there a villager looking for me? I walked out, and saw my brother from afar, His whole body is dirty, covered by dust, cement and sands. I asked him,
"Why don't you tell my roommate that you are my brother?"
He replied with a smile,
" Look at my appearance. What will they think if they know that I am your brother? Don't they laugh at you?"
I felt so touched, and tears filled my eyes. I swept away dusts from my brother's body. And said with a lump in my throat,
" I don't care of what people say! You are my brother no matter what your appearance is?"
From his pocket, he took out a butterfly hair clip. He wore it on me, and said,
"I saw all the girls in town are wearing it. So, I think you should also have one."
I could not hold back myself anymore. I pulled my brother into my arms and cried and cried.
That year, my brother was 20 years old; I was 23 years old.
The first time I brought my boyfriend home, the broken window had been repaired. And it looked so clean inside the house. After, my boyfriend went home, I danced like a small girl in front of my mother,
"Mom, you don't have to spend so many time cleaning the house!"
But she said with a smile,
" It was your brother who went home early to clean the house. Didn't you see the wound on his hand? He was injured while replacing the window."
I went into my brother's small bedroom. Looking at his thin face, I felt like there are hundreds of needle pricked in my heart. I put some ointment on his wound and bandaged it,
"Does it hurt? " I asked him.
"No, it doesn't hurt. You know, when I was working in the construction site, stones falling on my feet all the time. Even that could not stop me from working and?"
In the middle of the sentence, he stopped. I turned my back on him and tears rolling down my face.
That year, my brother was 23 years old; I was 26 years old.
After I got married, I lived in the city. Lots of time my husband invited my parents to come and live with us, but they didn't want. They said, once they left the village,they didn't know what to do. My brother also didn't agree, he said,
"Sis, you just taking care of your parents-in-law. I will take care of mom and dad here."
My husband became the director of his factory. We wanted my brother to get the job as the manager in the department of maintenance. But, my brother rejected the offer. He insisted on starting to work as a reparation worker.
One day, my brother was on the top of a ladder repairing a cable, when he got electrocuted, and was sent to the hospital. My husband and I visited him. Looked at the white gypsum on his leg, I grumbled,
"Why did you reject to be a manager? Manager will not do something dangerous like this. Look at you now, such a serious injury. Why you didn't want to listen to us?"
With a serious expression on his face, he defended on his decision,
"Think of brother-in-law? he just became the director, and I almost uneducated. If I became the manager, what kind of rumors will fly around?"
My husband's eyes filled up with tears, and then I said,
"But you lack in education also because of me!"
"Why talking about the past?" My brother held my hand.
That year, he was 26 years old and I was 29 years old.
My brother was 30 years old when he married a farmer girl from the village. In his wedding reception, the master of ceremonies asked him,
"Who is the one you respect and love the most?"
Without thinking, he answered,
" My sister."
He continued by telling a story I could not even remember.
"When I was in primary school, the school was in different village. Everyday, my sister and I walked for 2 hours to go school and go home. One day, I lost one of my pair of gloves. My sister gave me one of hers. She only wore one glove and walked for so far. When we got home, her hand was so trembled because of the weather that was so cold that she could not even hold her chopsticks. From that day on, I swore that as long as I live, I would take care of my sister and be good to her."
Applause filled up the room. All guests turned their attentions to me. Words were so hard to come out from my mouth,
"In my whole life, the one I would like to thank the most is my brother,"
And in this happy occasion, in front of the crowd, tears rolling down my face again.
Love and care for the one you love every single days of your life. You may think what you did is just a small deed, but to that someone, it may mean a lot. Have a nice day everyone! May this story inspire you in any way!
Friends Forever
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that's the end of the story... touching touching.....
i did cry for my brother...for him, infront of him, becuz of him.. anything that relate to him...... lol
dun think i'm very tough... lol.... which i'm not lah.... i can only say that the closest one in my family is my brother..
everything will find him de..fights, problems, school works.... blarblar.... all him...haha.... we also will help each other to cover up lol....
times when i think of IF any of my family members were to "go" to the far far land.. i will definaly cry untill cannot make it. and is kind of retard for me to think of such stuff... *choy* *choy*
he being an Uni student, while me juz a mere poly student. and aggrate wise.. he always being the smartest and the one that always being talked to and about among my relatives.....
though i noe that my parents esp my dad is proud of him cuz he's a Uni student among my family.... and times he outshine to me too much that i feel so inferior....
but nevertheless that i also proud of him...but times i also will tend to compare.. after all we r sibilings.. mah.... but i also understand that cant always compare ppl... "ren bi ren qi shi ren" and individuals are unique... dun u feel weird? even though u noe that "oh i should not comment this... i should not think that.. i should not do it..." u noe the theory, u noe the concept, u noe the results will be wat..... in the end, u still will think, do & act on it...
human have weird mind. or maybe is only me having the weird mind.
but undeniable, he's my support system... when i met with inciddent that i do not know what to do, do not know how to act upon, when i feel useless, when i am extremly down, when i juz like a person stranded in an island.. those mixed up feelings..... he's the one tat guide me through it.
i had a major life event last year. is really an inciddent where i'm at a junction and i really duno which pathway to walk to. i do not noe how to handle it... the emotional stress for me was very high. lots of happening things around me. i could only say i cried for nites and nites and nites. and he will always be there to consol me. talked to me.i really appreciate that.without him.. i might juz duno what to do.thinking of it now.. makes me want to cry... lol......
sily me. wat past is past.. why shall i think of it again.
and as always.. he will bully me as usual... blar..blar....from my friends.. *poor eemin.. always say by him horfun.. to him linking me to my kindergarden to primary school guys to sec. school friends.. saying i like Xxx or Yyyy.. then always say me.. Duhz.....* eh nth to do ah.... lol....
sounds sily. sound childish. but he's my brother afterall.... lol..... and happy to have him ^^
i think i better off to sleep again.. haah.. so lazy me.. hope u guys like the story and guess tonight or this morning... i talk a lot... hahaha....
oh... sadded today no sentosa for me :( hai think going down to my friend's house and chit chat ba... after all he came back from state.. at least check him out... haha...
ciaoz~ morning or nite to u guys :D
Saturday, September 18, 2004
8:23 PM
my com is dying -__________-'''
someone help me? my com is dying ah.......the resoultion like a bit siao siao liao leh.....
if u ask me to restart : i restarted the com le.
ask me to scan disk : scan liao.
haix........ wat to do now???? help help??
2:27 PM
aloha
aloha~ yesterday went out with my primary school friend, su to orchard... then juz walk walk and take neo-prints hahaa....if u interested then click on the link can direct to my multiply's homepage... lalalal~
anywya we chatted a lot... on gays, les, her b/f, everything that's happening loh.... hahaha......
now at home -.-''' looking at my assignment....... sadded lah....
here's my next week plan:
-> tue 2056 test
-> fri assignment due
i think next week my bio test result out.... so hopefully i can pass ba.....
oh i pass my clinical practical on injection & IV drip..... yippe~~ tat means i can offically say,... who ever bully me...watch out... lol..... *wink* *wink*
waiting for tmr :) going to sentosa... sun tan myself hahahah.........
Friday, September 17, 2004
10:47 AM
conspiracy vs conspiracy theory
yawnz morning.... hehe.. so happy today.. cuz today no school for me..... yeah yeah yippe~! longer weekends.. lalalala.....anyway woke up quite early.... cuz get used to it le... then chat with hp & des.. then went and see a video clip - 911 in plane site. happen to see it at des's blog.. and happen tat to watch the video clip to know what his blog was talking about... so... went and d/l and watch....
anyway.... same as him. for my friends who have time (the clip is 52mins), read the news on 9-11, curious to know wat's going on... i recommend u guys to d/l and watch... it makes u think after watching the show. and for my friends who are not curious about anything, no time and lazy to d/l the clip. u can skip this blog...
juz go to my link stated above and d/l the clip from des's blog.
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so thinking that if u continue reading my blog.. means that u have d/l and watched finish the clip. here goes...
the video clip was a disturbing clip as it shows me shocking and unreaveal issues whereby is not show in Tv shows, news paper stands.
is somthing that before i look at the video clip, things that i nv imagine would be.. would happen. if there's some conspiracy going on.
extracted from des's blog:
informations fed to us all over the world:
-> a boeing 757 crashed into pentagon at 400mph
-> outskirt wall of pentagon suffered an explosion
-> part of the pentagon's outskirt wall came tumbling down
wat did the video clip showed us:
-> analysis proved that the damaged created at pentagon crash site was much smaller than wat should be suffered from an impact of boeing 757 crashing in at 400mph..
-> the fuel inside the boeing 757 (assuming there's one) should be able to burn for at least 5 days and the heat created should had melted down all the metal reinforcement nearby, creating more destruction.. but instead the fire at pentagon's outskirt was put out on the day itself and only part of the building fallen off..
-> no visible wreckage can be seen from the footages available.. (assuming a plane came crashing in.. at least part of the plane's debris should be seen but again there was absolutely nothing there..)
-> FBI (goverment) apparently tried to confiscate all sources of video recordings that existed and only released images from only 1 camera which they had full control on to the media..
-> even the date on the images were wrong (they were dated 12 sept instead of 11 sept)..
-> all important witness at the scene refused to make comments to the public (erm maybe something happened between them and the FBI??)..
is a shocking clip for me to prove to me that.. things tat being broadcast at tv, at news channel and newpapers.. news may be unreal. there might be some covering.. hence tat lead to not the truth anymore.
we needs news channel, news papers to keep us inform the news. but ever imagine.. what if the news is not the truth??
and if there's consiracy between the usa in regards to 911 issues. then who is good? who's the evil?
is there a consipracy on the terroist grp that hijack the plane? or is juz a consipracy theory that they hijack it? wat if the terrorist did not hijack the plane?? what if is someone, some organization.. trying to do something... what if?? if u watched the video clip, they showed clips where it might not be a commercial airplane... it might be private or even military plane....
of cuz... i sound like backing up for them - the terrorist. please dun not misunderstand.. in regards only to the videoclip.
and for my view after watching the clip..: indeed there;s some consipracy going on. but i shall not make any firm stand on to who or where.
but to the russia sch hijack issue, to the jakata bomb attack.. having the 5 years old manny to survive the ordeal and many many more bomb attacks.. i seriously condemed terriost acts. especailly on kids. they are innocent, they still have a long way to go. why they juz have to pick them up? is becuz they are easy to command, easy to kinappe.. east target????
is a painful thinking of what's going on in this world. the war, the terriorst acts. everything, every issue will affect the child. not only child..but to everyone... deaths, injured, sufferings.
even the kids are able to survived in any case.. the inciddent sure give them a deep impression. even if they survived.. some might be disabled, the luckiler one.. might even shut off themselves to the world.
i remembered i read the news on the russia's attack...after the kids are saved.. one of the kid somehow said ( i forgotten it)... let me work, i don not want to go to school. even i want to go to school i will attend overseas school.
some even juz shut themselves up and dun talk to anyone... they are fealful of strangers.....
as what i said.. they still got a long way to go..... creating such an impact on them is juz a painful for me to see and feel.
everytime reading the newspaper.... news on bomb attacks, news on kidnap of forigeners at Baghdad...
it juz set me thinking... what;s going on in this world....
Tuesday, September 14, 2004
11:00 PM
cant be bother
i juz hate myself for being so emotional.and i juz dun understand why ppl can say they are not fine. and when asked them what happen. they say nth. or they juz cant bother to elaborate more.
and then the rest of the day/night u will be wondering wat's up.......
and some might juz complain complain and complain..... that they are down sad. but they juz dun want to tell wat's going on......
and i'm one of them.
contraindicated.
cant be bother.
and when ppl say i am sad. and the next thing the person can laugh... -.-''' first either he is acting brave acting tough or he has a great and strong metality or he juz wouldnt show his emotion out.
if u r unhappy. sad. juz show it out lah! is ok to be sad is allright to cry
who say showing ur emotions is wrong?
well.. showing ur emotions proves me that u are still a human. with feelings..
better u lie to urself that u are ok u are fine u are allright. juz admit the fact move on. time wouldn't stop and let u think for a super long time.... wheather it heals a not.... is up to u to stay at the same spot and rot and not to move on or move on and learn the mistake and move on again.
ai yah i juz duno what happen to me today. juz feel like blogging but blogging rubbish like tat........
ciaoz
sleep
8:34 PM
i am not innocent
I try to stay away from evil deeds but succumb to temptation every once in a while. I'm not quite on my way to hell but I certainly have some explaining to do.
Are you evil? find out at Hilowitz.com
6:52 PM
Fine Fine FIne
fine fine fine.....changes for my previous blog "happening 11-9"
1.ben did not box kk
2.Ben did not touch me
3.Kw did not touch me
fine? settle? happy?? T-T
watever watever watever..
6:28 AM
wondering.
brain is deadmind is blank
sitting alone wondering
is this what i want
is this what i feel
confuse confuse
life is nv a piece of cake
life is nv a bed of roses
life is not like a box of chocolate - e chances of getting something u dislike is high.
do i really want to do this
or is juz a pathway that i just walk over
life can be so confusing
or i am just the one creating the confusion............
Sunday, September 12, 2004
7:49 PM
Happening 11-9
this is gonna be a very very long blog...cuz a lot pictures and a lot of things to write....so.. on sat the usual 5 gangs of us... went down to center point pizza hut and eat.... before that..... ben was late..finally.... i'm not the late one.... lalalalala..... so kw, me, n min went to heeren and walk abt first.... at JE control station saw Cy.. ohh.. so coincidence... but we very bad also.. cuz forget to call him along.... somemore we were once a grp.. then he was like our "lao da" hai yo..... so paiseh paiseh...... eh....muz call him along for the next outing~
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Here r pics from Pizza hut ----->
*small headed me.. min head too big lah~~~~~~ or u want to get close to cy :P hehehee..... *
*finally can see my head liao~ lalala.~*
then in pizzahut.... then realise saw cy... so coincedence leh..... muz be stalking us... hahahaha......... so asked him to come along and take a grp pics~
*4 guys~ cy change his hairstyle better than the past.. nicer :)*
*again the 4 guys*
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so while cy went off for his supper... we sat down chit chatted....suan eemin till cannot make it.... actually wanna play zong ji mi ma de.... but then... our dearest eemin full liao.. (eat 2 slice of pizza) tat's it le.. -.-''' when she say full.. i haven actually full -____-''' so in the end... cant play also.. cuz she spolit the mood :X
so we walked walked to heeren.... my retribution comes liao... when they all start to suan me... -________-''' no comments lah~~
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so we go and take some neo prints.....
*ben's head too close up le wor, min min duno looking at where.. -.-'''*
*ah min put the crown on the head.. look so princess...~ *float float*~*
*the attack of ahben's Puffer fish!~!~* he very poor thing de.... we all decided to make face de... in the end... he's the only one producing the face.. lol~
*i like the cat at kk's shirt... haha we add on de.... suddenly i realise.. kw's hair.. looks like birdnest :X* opps~
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then we suddenly realise..... the machine take very very nice..... then we go and take again.... hahahaa..... so while we Q.. kk got bring his digi cam mah.... so we decide to take pics here n there....
*3 guys and a girl... suddenly i realised.... i very S.H.O.R.T.. so stress -_-''''*
*then min and the guys.... duno how come she go hide behind them... look so weird*
*haha.... Ben very cute in this pic... still can wink wink de leh.... -.-''''..anyway we took this inside the neo-print area.. haha..*
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so...we took the 2nd round neo-prints.... lalalala......
*lalalal... the flowers almost cover kk.. poor thing.. -.-'''*
*lol.. looks like me lying on ah ben's lap like tat... then my hair.. o_O how come go up.. look completly n.e.r.d.y -_________-'''*
*i think this one ah ben say ah min lying on kw's shoulder like very comfortable like tat... lol....*
*the last pic of us taking... haha.... my scanner abit dusty.. so gt lots of white white.. particles.. :P*i do think that i look kinda weird.. maybe cuz of my hair ba -.-'''*
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so finish the neo-print.... we walked walked around.... then go home le..... so while we reach mrt station... then we start to anyhow pic again.... hahaha....
*our shoes~*
*Star Star~ too big liao*
star
*clearer wor....guess which finger is mine :P*~
*another version..*
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then kk anyhow take pic and then they took this pic.... so they like so call interlink it -______________-''' btw.. i emphasis that.. kw nv touch me ok??
*walking together*
*touch -___________-''' he really nv touch....*
*and there i am crying.. cuz someone touch me.. and he still revolves around me....*
The above story.. are FAKE for ENTERTAINMENT oki...??
wow i think i can go be actress liao lah~~~~....... lol.........
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anyway back again at mrt.....
*backview of us~lalala.... saw my hand.? i actually wanna them to show the numbers de.. but the end only me.....-.-'''*
*prankster me... haha... kk and ben take pics.. i join in... by tiptoe my feet.. very hard to maintain leh... (i admit i'm s.h.o.r.t)i look so damn damn round -.-'''' *
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so inside the mrt........
*ben playing with his pole.. doing some acts on pole dance...... :X*
*then ben behind still can make funny face... then min and i said... ben got some girly charm.... u noe like the Wang Ren Fu of 5566?? haha.... but i noe that ben is 100% straight de..... or maybe not.... :X*
*and the 3 guys again....*
*ben's tongue stick out... wah.. he looks like so displeased like tat.... -.-'''*
*is ben :P at kw.. who doesn't seem to care abt it....*
or was he......
BOx le.. kk then Stick the tongue????? bad bad ben~~~~~
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so we took the train untill Je.. then still want to take picture again 0.0..min suggest we take those sad sad pics like parting le mah.... so hor.... muz look sad....
*dun think look sadded leh... i look like falling sleeping......then i realise eh... wass up with ah ben's hand :X -.- ben ah ben wat ur hand going to do ah?? :P*
then... take a happy looking de pic......
*look at our fingers showing the number..... 1,2,3,4,5 Hi 5!~*
*this is a bad bad pic.... they b.u.l.l.y me... hai yo... all poke me -.- sadded sadded i dun want to say de.... how come kw and ben's face look so bad... Huai Dan!!! Naughty boys*
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anyway... i shall present to u... the "Couples corner" lol..........
*ah min and kk*
*min & kk part2*
*ben & Min*
*min & me*
*kw and me*
*ben & me*
min & me again
*Kw & min*
*kw & me again* Ignore the hand*
*kk & me*
Oh..... Who's most look like couples?? (hint* the pic long long de..) :P
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anyway finally finish blogging... took me 1h45mins!!!!!!!!!! cheeze...... i better off typing this and go and read my bio.... haven finish my hormones...... ahhhhhh............................................
wish me good luck ok??? MUZ wish me Good Luck leh...... otherwise i call ah ben to
hehehehe........ Take care anyway i enjoy myself very much........ :D
*thanks ben (hope u noe wat i'm referring)*
anyway tat's it le..... Ciaoz Guys~~~~~~~~~~~~
2:19 PM
waiting waiting
how i wish to blog abt yesterday..... but i cant.. cuz kk's pic haven send me.. so cannot show n tell u guys wat's happening....T-T
anyway.... slacking now.... juz now study my bio T-T Chim ah!!!! die le loh... lol..... help help......
Saturday, September 11, 2004
11:30 AM
thoughts
yesterday chatted with serveral of my friends at msn. and coincidently we all are talking abt relationship that revolves in us, around us...chatted with kw, glad to hear him saying abt his dream girl. but he said its a dream girl can't establish to further more.
at least. glad to noe that he got someone in his mind to look/dream upon... realise quite a number of my friends got either someone in the mind or attached..
oh
talk abt attached... yesterday chatted with my friend, he said he gonna married his gf next year le..
congrats to him. :)
but yesterday when he tell me the news.. i do feel some part of sadness ba. probably i listening to sentimental songs.. and the he was once someone i like.. but somethings not really meant to be mine.. so.. leave it ba.
but. nevertheless. happy for him that he has found his one :) and i will look forward to attend his wedding nite. but will he invite me first..haha...
then chatted with another friend online, read abt his blog. can sensed that he's not in gd mood. talking abt past, talking abt relationship. think he juz want to vex it all out.
then chatted with him.. how lame can he be.. very lame.... he can be the lamest ppl around loh..
i hate ppl say "i better off dead"... please do not say this kind of depressive words infront of me..... everyone born out here has its part.. u might not know what u are part of the society, part of this environment.... but i strongly believe that once u born out into this world. u are definitly not useless, not a waste, u have its own part to contribute. maybe is not as obvious than others, maybe is juz a small small part. but at least u noe that u have some contribution to this world and u might even can brighten someone day.. some ppl dun have wat u have..
facing any problems, talk to someone, blog abt it, vexed it out.... better than u keep everything inside urself..
i might not be everytime be there for u guys. but juz wanna say. if u need any ears to listen, any thing to brighten up the day. gimmi a call or msg. i'll try to help as much as i could.
though my mini ears cant help much. but cheer up :)
wow.. blog and blog.... think i stop here le ba
anyway.. jerry yan's - yi gong chi very nice :)
go and study le... then go out at the evening with my friends :)
ciaoz. cheers~
Friday, September 10, 2004
10:13 PM
disappear
eh..... this morning i got blog in sch de... but hor...... d.i.s.a.p.p.e.a.r le..the mystery of lian's precious blog........ Sob sobanyway..... i feel like blogging. but i duno what to blog.
thinking.
thinking.
thinking
of gonna sleep........... :P
Thursday, September 09, 2004
8:15 PM
Yeah~
yeah~~finally 1 paper d.o.w.n :) feel quite confident abt it.... hahha.. can pass can liao le.....
next bio practical -.-''''
sadded stress
anyway..... my long lost pri. sch mate is back from the states.. he really make a promise that he will be back ard sept... wow... will try to give some time to check how was he...
anyway.... haha.. he was ONCE my crush.... lol...... but......... is past liao hahaha..... (dun think he will read my blog right -________-''')
but is glad to see him back in singapore... hope to see him soon :)
6:25 AM
This is D day!``
Hoho~ today is D day!!well.. obviously not my bday.... but is my test.... and i'm so proud becuz... i managed to get only 3++ hrs of sleep!!!
and.
i still so awake...
pray for me later dun fell asleep...... anyway the nescafe is damn powerful... yesterday chiong studying juz drink one can... can last me till 130am... then wanna to catch some sleep but i can't sleep -.-'''
so i juz close my eyes... on and off.. wake up go to toliet...then close again.... sometimes i dun even noe if i'm sleeping anot......
then 3.45am like tat wake up.... and allright lah.. can squeeze watever to go in loh...... but hor... still pray for me oki??
since i got time..... then blog blog loh..... later lesson at 8am.. gonna catch some nap at mrt ba...... i think i will fall asleep during one of the lecture.... lol...
muz restrain myself nt to drink coffee for today.....cannot drink coffee toomuch...bad for health.
better start packing my bag... Law lesson here i come...~
Wednesday, September 08, 2004
4:42 PM
-_-'''
before i going to have a nap.. and to chiong my nite today... and morning.... for my tmr test at 5pm which like 24hrs and a bit more to go -.-''''tmr test sux stinks ewww watever disgusting words on it.....
cuz... the test consists of topics we have not been taught.....-.-''' haix. chim chim chim....
then one of the lecturer say... yes! is being teach! (my foot! eat my shoe!! teach in ur dream land lah)
2 clinical books to study and include 2035 module to link... hai..... juz make it open book test... i wish.... -.-''''
even my lab teacher say some of the topics haven teach yet.... and then now how? to study or not to study..... hai hai hai......
watever lah..... now take a nap.. tonight gonna chiong till the next morning.... watch out for my pandan eyes tmr.... O_O
Jia you jia you~
Tuesday, September 07, 2004
11:11 PM
.....
how i wish to blog abt how unhappy i am on the test on thur. but seriously i'm too dead tired..gotta sleep. gonna wake up super early to study. (i think some friends noe how early i am waking up to study..... T_T)
juz hope i got energy to type tmr ba.
nite
10:17 AM
o_O yawnz
oh.. since i've got nth to do.. and trying to slack for a while.. hmm.... ahhh...today
my
lesson
end
till
8pm
haix...... the usual thing lah... every tue will hear me nag abt 8pm...... yawnz......
stinks stinks....
wed got presentation le..... -.-'''
pray for me.. bless me ah....
thur got test....
pray somemore........ ^^
--------------------------------
wat a rubbish day i'm gonna start with rubbish stuff i'm saying..... -.-'''''
Monday, September 06, 2004
6:09 PM
what soul am I ??
You have a Calm Soul! Being calm and cool is what you do best. You collected thoughts and always positive attitude make you very bright and logical. When theres a problem, you know how to approach it, and solve it. Your friends rely on you on their problems, and your shoulder for their crying. You are peaceful, and enjoy nature and freedom. You rarely get angry and hardly scream, which makes you good with kids. You seem to be in tune with the world and if anything goes wrong, you always bounce back.
hmmmm..... ok lah.... rarely get angry.... haha..... i dun think so loh... depends on who stepping on my toes and what happens to me loh... hahaha... but i think tat also explain i cant be bother abt wats going on with the anoyomous guy liao.... lalalalla. gonna get bz and stress for this week.... T_T week 10, 11, 12 got tests + presentations!!!!! then 13 and 14 going to attachement..... it stinks right??? -.-'''' sadded sadded.....
Sunday, September 05, 2004
9:38 AM
my condolences to the families of victims in russia.
recently, watched channel newsasia and was stunned by the news of the russia school hostage crisis.militians, believed to be separatisits from chechnya, seized the school. they armed with rocket lauchers and explosive belts..
the 3 days seige.. causes 300+ people dead.. and the most horrifying is that half of them are children..
is very saddening for me to see and hear the news... watching the news as they showed the anxious family member hoping their children are alive..
why do they have to do this? they are only kids.. they still have a long way to go.. and yet their lives ended..
there was this news that i read yesterday.. was abt the militians allowing only 1 kid to be released. one mother was trying to shove her daughter to someone but was spotted by the militans...and..the mother made a hard decision to leave her daughter and bring her son out...
it was hard decision for her.. a very hard decision... wat abt u.. what will u do?..
early in the morning.. so saddening... : /
Friday, September 03, 2004
9:32 AM
to Anonymous
to anonymous:first of all.... speak truthfully...i have no idea who are u..and i dun remember anyone with the name TSW (if that's ur initial) in poly...
2nd, Anonymous: I KnOw U SaY BeiNg iNvOlvEd iN ReLaTioNshIp eAsy, BuT DiD U gIvE YrSelF a ChaNce To LoVe & TaKe CaRe Of U. <--- (did i say being involved in relationship is easy?? nahx... i dun find being in relationship is easy at all. nth is like a bed of roses. i would love to give myself a chance to love and to be love. however. if it applies to ur case. to whom i have no idea who the heck are u. i'm sorry. but i juz have no idea who are u.)
3rd. if u are my friend or whoever. u can send me a sms. i think this is rather a personalise thing.
4th. if u are playing a prank... which i have no idea.. n if u r playing a prank.. haha.. if i happen to noe who r u.. i can tell u.... u are dead liao... lol.....
to all my friends out there....speak truthfully to my memory extend i have no idea who tat person is. so dun ask me anymore who is he... haha.....
ciaoz~
Wednesday, September 01, 2004
7:05 PM
*love?love?love?*
hmm... juz drop by looking at desmond's blog... wondering why he yesterday tell me he very "firece" in the blog. that no girls will date him out.. haha.. now i understand liao....probably before u guys read my blog.. i think u guys should read his blog before reading mine.. cuz is so call my comments to him and my views on it loh.. :D
so here's his link http://iamjuztoobored.blogspot.com/2004/08/something-special-for-today.html
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anway.... ur joke hor.. u change to nostril ah?? cuz i hear is a**hole de.. haha... somemore is not jackfruit de.. is pineapple.... well... guess u are nice lah.... dun want to corrup ppl.... lol~.....
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true enough.. how serious is teenager in relationship?? how ready are they to commit in relationship?? i think most of the ppl having their first stead at sec. sch.. most ppl that i know...
how ready is ready? how serious is serious? i have no clue how to measure it... how do u noe that it might be just a crush or maybe just a lust?
having many breakups doesnt mean they are not serious. that applies to having many boyfriend/girlfriends doesn't mean they are flirtish.
but i did not say ALL of them. they are ppl who are known as playboy or playgirl i have no comment on them.
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i believe that there's a point of time where u will think that u are ready or are not ready to have a relationship.
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there are times where u get influence by ur friends ard.. having to see them having stead.... and u being alone.. the feeling stinks.
there are times where ppl juz want to "hao lian" to others that i have a gf/bf to the other pp......
there are times where u are feeling so down, so lonely.. then suay to the guy/girl act as a replacemnt.....
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there are points in life that one have no clue abt what he/she feels abt the person..... and have no idea if he/she ready for a relationship... and if to accept this clueless relationship.. the percentage is not too high to survive...
i have friend who tell me this "love can grow de...." but not having a strong, direct feeling for the person cant allow me to fall in love with the person.
if the person is not ready to commit and is not thinking well and not comfortable with it.. to be involve in relationship is not a very good idea.
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for ppl who uses relationship as just a way to resolve their sextual means.... i definatly not supporting the idea abt it.
then i can conclude that their relationship is juz purly abt sex. not love. no commitment. no nth. juz physical expose to one another. so in the first place why go for relationship??
and i really dislike guy who use "if u dun have sex with me, i will not love u" or "i will breakup with u" if she does not do wat he wants.....
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when girls ask "why do u love me" "how much u love me".... hey... we are just trying to know how much we are in u guys. and what isit that u choose me than others.... guys might feel tiring. feeling that we are nagging... but have u consider our feeling?
the feeling to know what isit so special abt herself that her bf will choose her... the feeling to feel pamper.. (hehe some girls like to "Sa jiao" using those questions)
but aren't u guys lucky to have these kind of girlfriend? would u prefer ur g/f to be so dead quiet.. and not to ask any of these questions?
true enough... if ask too many times... the girl gonna kill the bf soon.... but sometimes occassionally juz pop out tat question.... a little spice will bring up the relationship :)
for ns guys... of cuz sat is ur most precious little hours..... but thinking that ur poor gf being not able to see u 5 days liao... then sat still have to break her little heart.... of cuz all these have to give and take..... i am not saying U MUST MEET UR GF EVERY SAT.... but i think ur gf would like it to be like tat..
and of cuz the gf will have to understand the poor bf.. having to march under hot sun and being so tired... of cuz bf doesnt have the energy to accompany..learn to be in ur bf shoe :)
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relationship is all abt learning from one another. learn mistakes together. all abt learn to give and take and of cuz lastly trust, respect, commitment to one another
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throughout my 18 years life... i have broke ppl's heart.. ppl have broke my heart.. for ppl that treated me very well but in turn i have broken it. sorry to u. i have not made a proper sorry in the past..
life still have to move on... i had my thinking done.. there are times where i see couples so close, so lovly. it does make me feel kinda down. it does make my mind to ponder... when will i have my turn to be like them?
but i also understand that being involve in relationship is not as easy as abc.. it doesn't seen to be so smooth like the surface..i heard cases from friends.. i have seen ppl breaking ups..patching back...sobbing alone.. unable to forget the person.. lots & lots more.....
i am not saying i'm experience now..... but if there's a day where i can find him. i will try my very best in the relationship... for now.. just pray for me to find my him.. and also for my singles friend to find ur him or her :)
oh yah.... stop asking me to get a bf...lol... let nature & fate takes its course.. i cant force ppl to fall in love with me and i cant force myself to in love with others...